Quit round peg square-holing it

Thankfully my quest for the perfect ponytail ceased circa 1995…But letting go? Now that is a doozy! And for me, personally, one of the hardest spiritual lessons that I have been trying to master since being fully committed to my quest.

I fit the Aries stereotype to a tee. Headstrong. Goal Orientated. Driven. Competitive. Enthusiastic. Courageous. Impatient. Impulsive. Energised. Aries also typically jump before they think…if that doesn’t scream Mel, I don’t know what else does?! Yes, some of these traits, when channeled appropriately, are highly beneficial and definitely an asset to possess. But they are certainly far from being along the lines of allowing things to flow and let be…

So what does it mean to really Let Go or Let Be? When you are letting go, you are surrendering to what is. You are saying to the universe that you trust whatever crosses your path is just what you need in every moment. That you will allow whatever crosses your path to unfold just as it needs to without trying to force and control an outcome. By letting go, you are affirming your belief that you live in a friendly universe that is abundant and that you will always be provided for and protected.

When you learn to truly let go, you free yourself from the pain, fear and hurt that is associated with whatever it is that you are desperately clinging to or trying to manipulate. You also open yourself to all of the options that are available to you in every moment. When you are living in the present moment and allowing to be, you are limitless. But when you are clinging to something or trying to make something work, your possibilities and the range of your potential are limited.

Our journey as human beings is not about following a preordained path, but about creating that path. Life rarely makes any more sense when things are done ´in order´. Life makes sense when we are centred in our hearts and we let go of resisting how our unique journey needs to unfold in its own beautifully unruly way. – @thebehappyproject

I can practically feel the head nods of acknowledgement as you’re reading these words, but I can also hear the cringes…I get it. All good in theory, but how on earth does it work in practice?! I mean…how do I really Let Go, is it even really possible???…especially when I really, really, really want it/them…

+ Don’t resist. Resistance creates pain. By resisting and not allowing things in your life to show up and unfold just as they need to, you are not allowing. Let it flow, and let it go. Look for the positive lesson in whatever is occurring (or trying to occur). Accept things how they are in the present moment, knowing that you can always desire a different outcome for the future. Everything is energy, it is constantly changing and as a powerful co-creator of your own existence, don’t forget that you have the power to manifest your future path. Remember that it is you who is determining your future. So decide.

+ Focus on what you can control. And in most instances, the only thing you can (and really only ever want to control) is you, your perceptions and beliefs. What can you do to make yourself happy right now? What can you do to restore the balance within? What do you need right now in this moment? Be good to yourself. Make yourself a priority. Remember that change happens for a reason. Ever have something happen in your life that seems so debilitatingly devastating at the time but then when you look back, you realise that actually it was the best thing that could have ever happened to you? Either you learned an important lesson or it opened an unexpected door down the line. Endings occur so that new beginnings can commence. And while you may think that you know what is best for you or is in line with your Highest Good, you may not. You may also be selling yourself short! Who knows what amazing adventures or opportunities are waiting for you on the other side? But by resisting and forcing what you think needs to happen and when or how it must look, you are delaying your future miracles. Don’t let your fear (and ego) run the show.  Release any perceived judgments. And remember, when things seem like they are hitting the fan, think of your future self, it’s more likely than not that he/she will be grateful for your current experience. So ride that wave, baby!

+ Don’t be afraid to feel your pain. One of the main reasons why we resist and desperately cling on to things longer than we need to is because we want to avoid the pain and discomfort associated with whatever it is we are trying to make happen. By allowing yourself to feel your pain and worry associated with the unknown (or releasing your resistance to the pain occurring), the situation will no longer have power over you. And when the situation no longer has power, it goes away. Or if it doesn´t, it doesn´t matter anymore, does it? It no longer owns you…

+ Trust your journey. Trust that the universe is always operating for your highest good. Trust your soul, it knows your deepest desires and true path. Connect within. Meet yourself. It is in your inner stillness that you will find the peace and comfort that you are seeking. You will find the strength and courage that you need for blind faith.

As with much of my spiritual spiels and rants these days, it all comes back to a common theme. Self love. Self-love is the root of it all. When you have cultivated a strong foundation of self-love within, the thoughts, opinions and actions of others (or the situations that are going on around you) will no longer affect you the way they once did. Your need to control and manipulate and force will dissipate.

A person that loves themselves deeply knows themselves intimately. They do not need the presence of another or have a certain situation in their life unfold in a particular way in order to validate their existence or know their self-worth. They already know exactly who they are and what they deserve. And if what is currently before them is not cutting it or falls aways, they won´t be afraid to hold out or let go and wait for something that is more aligned with their highest good.

When you love yourself fully, you don’t fear the other side. The unknown. Because you know that you can trust yourself. 100%. You have your back always and you love yourself unconditionally. No matter what happens, you know that you are there for yourself and will put yourself first.

There is you and you. This is a relationship. This is the most important relationship. Home. – Nayyirah Waheed

Remember, you can´t force things. It´s all energy. You have to be brave enough to let what is trying to fall away, fall away. But remember that the biggest blessing about this magical life is that literally anything can happen at any time…so why would you want to deny (or delay) yourself the surprise in finding out what happens next?!

So there you have it beauts, 5 ways to loosen your grip and lessons in learning to let go. Have any other hot tips to let go? Or is there something that you are struggling to let go of? I’d love to hear from you!

Thank you for being YOU!

Big love,

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